I FEEL SO SORRY FOR MYSELF~

For all the things I've done for him, there's one thing that made me feel regret with. - FOR ONE TIME, I FORGOT TO THINK ABOUT MYSELF. I've given so much and felt so much pain without even thinking to leave something even a bit for myself.

5hours, 54mins, 36seconds.. exactly from this time on, i can feel that he's now going to leave me. *HANDS UP* I cant do anything about it anymore. As what they're saying, what's the sense of holding on to someone who's not in love with you anymore. For all the sacrifices you've done for him - it's just NOTHING. He didn't even realize my worth. Nothing hurts more than realizing he meant everything to you, but you meant nothing to him.His friends said, │"let him go" │"You deserve better"│.. I'm so pissed off. I hate talking about these stuffs, about how i became so pathetic, martyr && stupid enough to let him do those things to me.

I know it'll be very hard for me to let go of everything - the love i still have for him (will take long enough to fade), the memories that still lingers on my mind (probably will just stay in my mind forever), the plans we've been planning will only be happened in my dreams && the promises that he made me hold on to will only be the words of assurance of my yesterday. I've even dreamed to be his wife of our kids, waking up each day beside him and plan things that will come our way. I never knew it'll end up this way, he said he's going to change and he even asked for a 2nd chance but where is it now? I cant see nor feel any changes from him.

People change, yes indeed.. so I believe everything will get back how on it was used to be. All I want is to get back where things make sense.

It makes me wonder if it does hurt him too, or even think of me when he's doing all those things.. because if YES, he wont keep doing it all over again - if NO, probably he just don't care at all.

PS:

♥ I FEEL SO SORRY FOR MYSELF.

LSS:

♥ MY HAPPY ENDING│AVRIL LAVIGNE